HASNA MANA HAI.................

Sorry
if i hurt anyone
its just for fun


What’s the biggest pressure for Pak captain when Pak needs 1 run to win in 8 ovrs, with 5 wickets in hand?
Ya Allah! How to speak English in presentation ceremony?


Beggar: Saab 12Rs do na coffee peeni hai.
Man: Lekin coffee to 6Rs ki hai?
Beggar: Par saab girlfrend bhi to hai.
Man: Bhikari hokar bhi GF banali.
Beggar: Na saab,GF ne Bhikari bana diya!

Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!


Ek samay ki bat hai, Mata Lakshmi ji ka ULLU unse rooth gaya aur bola, 'Apki sab puja karte hain, mujhe koi nahin puchhta'
Lakshmi ji boli: Ab se har sal meri puja se 8-10 din pehle tumhari puja hogi. Us din Ullu puje jayenge.
Tabhi se Diwali k pehle us din ko KARWA CHAUTH keh kar manaya jata hai!


10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of
accidentsarer due to driving without drinking! Piyo Sar Utha Ke!

A Solid reason for having two girlfriends at one time: Monopoly is always damaging & Competition improves service!

Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahathma Gandhi
Dasto hun bapu di maniye ya chache ki?

Dil ke operation ko BYEPASS kyo kehte hain?
Kyon ki agar operation theek ho gaya to... PASS varna Hamesha ke liye BYE!

Lalu: Rabri, tum to hamara CHAND ho.
Rabri: Na ji hamka CHAND VAND mat kahiye, ye sasure America wale roj Chand pe chadte utarte rahte hai.

Yamraj ne ek ladke ki jaan le li. Chitragupt- Is ko waqt se pehle kyon mara?
Yumraj: Kya karun, March end mein target jo pura karna tha.

Kabhi ye mat socho tumhare gf/bf ya wife/hubby ne tumhe kitna romantic msg bheja hai,
sirf yeh socho ke Use kisne bheja hoga ?


Teacher: Agar apna character sudharna hai to sab auraton ko MAA kaha karo.
Student: Madam is se mera character to theek rahega, par mere baap ka bigad jayega.

U luv sumone... u marry sumone else. The one u marry becomes ur wife or husband &
the one u loved becomes the password of your emai id...

Mom: Beti badi ho kar kya karogi?
Beti: Kuch nahin... Maan banungi, padhungi, shaadi karungi... aur kya?
Mom: Jo karna hai karo par zara serial order mein karna.

Ek ladka ek ladki k saath baitha tha.
2nd day doosri ladki k saath deha gaya.
3rd day koi aur ladki thi.
4th day kisi nayi ladki ke saath tha
Moral: Ladkiyan badal jaati hain, ladke nahin badaltey

Manmohan Singh: We are sending Indians to the moon next year!
Bush: Wow! Howc many?
Manamohan: 25 OBC, 25 SC, 20 ST, 5 Handicapped, 5 Sports Persons, 5 Terrorist Affected, 5 Kashmiri Migrants, 9 Politicians & if possible 1 Astronnaut

In a class, teacher asked: If I buy an item@ 12.75 n sell@15.25, it's loss or profit?
Pappu: Profit in rupees & loss in paise

MAIN SHAYAR TOH NAI!!!!!!!!!!!

Collection of Shayari
************ ********* ********* ********* ********* ********* ******


Ye dil udaas hai bahut
Ye dil udaas hai bahut koi paighaam hi likh do
tum apna naam na likho chalo gumnaam hi likh do
Meri kismat me gham-e-tanhai hai lekin
tamam umr na likho magar ek shaam hi likh do
Ye janta hoon ke umr bhar tanha mujhko rehna hai
magar pal do pal, ghadi do ghadi mera naam hi likh do
Chalo hum maan lete hain saza ke mustahiq thehre
koi inaam na likho, koi ilzaam hi likh do
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
Hamare Jaise Nahi

Thaame Rakhna Haath Hamara Aise Hi
Dete Rehna Saath Zindagi Bhar Aise Hi
Yu To Milenge Zindagi Mein Chahne Wale bahut
Milenge To Bas Hamare Jaise Nahi
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
Zindagi

Zindgi se hamne kabhi kucch chaha hi nahin
Chaha jise bhi kabhi paya hi nahin
Jise paya use kucch yun kho diya
Jaise zindgi me kabhi koi aaya hi nahin
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
itna intzaar hai

ik baat puchte rehte hain hum,
bhagwan se fariyaad mein,
aisa kya hai unki har baat mein,
kyun aati hai bar bar woh meri yaad mein,
kya bhagwan yahi woh pyar hai,
jisko milne ke liye kiya,
hamne itna intzaar hai.
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
kuchh mausam sapne lagte hain

shabnam ke katron mein kaise khiza ke rang jhalakte hain
phoolo ke chehro se kushboo ke moti bikharte hain
hawao ki rawani se aati hai sargam kar rimjhim
jab pani ke lehron se voh atkheliya karti aati hai
pairon ke kitaron mein phir thandak bansane aati hai
jab suraj se mil kar sham suneheri ho jati hai
kuch mausam sapne lagte hain kuch mausam apne lagte hain
par dost mile tum jaisa to sub mausam sache lagte hain
zindgi ki tanha lehron mein jo dosti ke moti pirote hain
voh phoolon ki traha dil ki rahon ko mehkate hain
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
dil dhadakta hai usi ke liye

mana ki ham bhula nahi paate unhe ek pal ke liye
par yu roya bhi nahi jaata ek pal ke liye
mila jo yu wo milkar bichhad gaya zindgi ke liye
unhe dil se nahi lagaya jaata dillagi ke liye
mana ki ye baat har kisi ko lagti hai sacchi
par har ajnabi nahi hote jamane mein bhulane ke liye
yu to khuda se jo maanga wo paya dua mein
par har dua kahan kabul hoti hai har kisi ke liye
wo aayega na lautkar fir kabhi ye jaante hain
fir bhi dil dhadkta hai aaj bhi usi ajnabi ke liye
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
Jind Jaan

Hasdi Rahe Hamesha Meri Jaan
Kar Dewaan Jind Main Ohton Kurbaan
Dekh Ke Lok Khush Ohnu Ho Jande Ne Hairaan
Ki Banke Oh Rahegi Hamesha Sadi Jind Jaan
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -

Dua Rab se

Dua hai us rab se kabhi tumhain dard ka ehsaas na de
Pal koi aisa na guzre jab mushkilo me ham saath na de
Kisi saans me ham tumko bhule, rab hame aisi saans na de
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
Phir Yaad Aane Lage

Muddaton baad dekha unhe, Hosh kaise thikane lage
Ashq palko par aye meri aur lab thar-tharane lage
Jane kaise hawa ye chali, phool phir muskurane lage
Jinko mushkil se bhule the ham phir wahi yaad aane lage
------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
nazar aata hai

mujhe pata nahin kya ho jata hai,
neend aati nahin or chain kho jata hai,
phir dil bechain ho jata hai,
or khwaab kuch aisa aata hai,
ki aap ka hath hamare hathon mein,
or sar hamare kandhe pe nazar aata hai.

TEST YOUR EYES

Find the letter in 10 seconds.
If not you must be a pensioner :P

Find C ?

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Din you find C ? ; where is 6 ??

9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999699999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999
9999999999999999999999999999999999

U find them?? OK. Go on for N....

MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMNMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM
MMMMMMMMMMMMM

This is the last. Find the Q...

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOQOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Did you find them under 10 sec.??

You have healthly eyes.

Not under 10 sec?

Relax and have a little holiday.

MANNER MANOEUVRES

MANNER MANOEUVRES;

When an American wife says,"Would you get a handkerchief for me from upstairs?", her husband would get it for her.

When a Chinese wife makes the same request,her husband will tell their child,"Go upstairs & get a handkerchief for your mother."

When an English wife asks,her husband will say,"Have you broken your leg or something?"

When a Russian wife asks,her husband will do it,and then say,"Comrade,I dropped my pen while I was upstairs will you get it for me?"

WEIRD THOUGHT

"Hey, I just had a crazy thought, what if you were the catalyst to change the world?" What if all it took was one thought, that led to one decision that led to one action in your own life that could change the world; if only for a moment. Maybe it would go something like this...you think to yourself how wonderful it could be if just one somebody would love, encourage and respect one anybody, make them feel as if they were NOT a mere nobody and watch the light of acceptance spring to their eyes. You could smile at someone. You could speak to others. You could even smile when you spoke. You could say 'Thank You' and 'You're Welcome' and mean it. In very simple ways you could touch the lives of others with love, which causes them to touch others lives with love, and so on and so on. You could hold the door open one second longer for the next person. You could choose to see the good, the great and the best in each person you see today. You could think blessing thoughts for others - say prayers for the favor of God, the promises of God, the love of God to overwhelm complete strangers you come across today. You could look for ways to serve, savor and share pleasant moments in life. You could offer a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and arms to give hugs. You could show extraordinary patience with your spouse, your child, your parent, your friend, your cousin, your coworker, your boss, your teacher, your dog, your pastor, or your church. You could forgive anyone. You could speak life (possible) and not death (impossible) to a dream or a hope of someone brave enough to share their dream or hope with you. You could NOT repeat the latest gossip only meant to hurt and cause shame for others. You could NOT join the bandwagon of beating a brother when he.s down. You could NOT step on the heads of others to get a leg up. You could NOT close your ears and your heart to the cries of your neighbors. You could NOT complain about the government and refuse to vote. You could NOT believe the stereotypes promulgated by the media against a race, a nationality, a gender, a city, a state, or a nation. While some of these things may seem challenging and may cost you a little effort, a little time, a second thought, they are worth it. These simple acts won't leave you broke and quite frankly they may enrich you in ways you could have never dreamed. All it takes is a thought, then a decision followed by an action. What would be really crazy is if you wait; this is really out there. You might have to go the extra mile for this one. Are your ready? Now really think about this, what if you started with YOU! Now that's crazy, isn't it?

YAAD KARO WOH BITE HUE DIN......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE COMPLAN BOY(Shahid Kapoor) & THE COMPLAN GIRL(Ayesha Takia)

SALMA SULTANA FIRST LADY NEWS READER

THE FIRST DESI DETECTIVE "BYOMKESH BAKSHI"

ONE OF THE FIRST CRIME NEWS PROGRAM

THE FAMOUS ADD "MILE SUR MERA TUMAHARA"

LEGENDARY EPIC RAMAYANA

DEKH BHAI DEKH

MALGUDI DAYS

DOORDARSHAN SCREENSAVER

DOODRDARSHAN LOGO

HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB?

HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB?

Put about 100 bricks in some
Particular order in a closed
Room with an
Open window.

Then send 2 or 3 candidates in
The room and close the door.

Leave them alone and come back
After 6 hours and then analyze
The situation.

If they are counting the
Bricks.
Put them in the accounts
Department.

If they are recounting them..
Put them in auditing .

If they have messed up the
Whole place with the bricks.
Put them in engineering.

If they are arranging the
Bricks in some strange order.
Put them in planning.

If they are throwing the
Bricks at each other.
Put them in operations ..

If they are sleeping.
Put them in security.

If they have broken the bricks
Into pieces.
Put them in information
Technology.

If they are sitting idle.
Put them in human resources.

If they say they have tried
Different combinations, yet
Not a brick has
Been moved. Put them in sales.

If they have already left for
The day.
Put them in marketing.

If they are staring out of the
Window.
Put them on strategic
Planning.

And then last but not least.
If they are talking to each
Other and not a single brick
Has been
Moved.

Congratulate them and put them
In top management